There was a seriously disturbing letter published by Autism Speaks today on their blog. It was a hateful letter from angry parents at an Elementary School who were asking the parents of an autistic child to remove him from the school. They blamed the parents for his autism saying he wasn't normal and that it was the parents fault for not disciplining him. They said not to make the normal kids suffer for their lack of parenting and that they would be embarrassed to have the worst kid in the school. There was much more to the letter, but you get the point....Hateful... But when I read this I couldn't help but to try and see their perspective. After all, I have 2 "normal" kids. How would I feel if they were in a class with a child who was disruptive and aggressive? I honestly don't know. I know I wouldn't send a completely atrocious letter to their parents, but I might get annoyed or concerned. So I wonder what the best way to handle this would be.....For starters, I believe the parents at that school along with so many others need to be thoroughly educated on autism and that the children's behavior isn't from the parent's lack of discipline. That becomes obvious when you observe parents that have both kids with and without autism. They are the same parents to both yet one has autism and one doesn't. It just overwhelms me that people can be such bullies. I guess this struck a nerve today when reading it because Jacob has developed some recent behaviors that I don't know how to deal with. He has started biting in addition to his recent temper tantrums. He has occasionally in the past bit people when he got nervous or overwhelmed by a large group or loud noises, but the other day I went to church to set up for Awana and I put him in a room with his sister and brother only. He is very comfortable with them and usually is fine. On this particular day he was crying for me. I let him cry and continued to finish what I needed to get done, which was less than 10 minutes. When I went to get him out of the room I looked at his arm and he had bit it over and over and even drew blood. Since then he has started to bite more and more. I don't know what to do. Why does he want to hurt himself? Its incredibly sad and frustrating. The not knowing what is wrong and the not knowing how to help him is the worst. If I am not careful I find myself in a downward spiral of pity and confusion and sadness. I read articles like the one from Autism Speaks and I get so angry and I think "WHY"? Why does this happen to these kids, why are these parents going through this? Why can't I figure out how to help Jacob. I wonder when will this get easier? Why is AUTISM so confusing? I need a break!!!
But that's not the right thinking. We all think that at times, right? You don't have to have a child with autism to get stressed out or feel like you deserve more or better. I guess I just keep thinking higher of myself than I should. Why do I feel like its unfair for me to have these trials or tribulations? Its because my focus is on things of this world. I'm comparing, I'm wanting to have it easy. I want life to be fun and carefree. But God doesn't promise me a life of ease....
"....In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." John 16:33
God will be right there with me through my trials. He has overcome the world, and that is such an awesome and powerful thing to think about. Through Jesus' blood I am forgiven and will live forever in Heaven with my Father and I need to focus on things of God, things of eternity and not things that change day by day. As I studied the Bible today I found myself in Romans...My favorite book....
"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2
What is God teaching me right now, through Jacob, through autism, through my hardships? What does God want me to learn? I need to keep praying that God will reveal His will for me through all this and know and trust that this is what's best for me and be content. Everything that I do I need to do for the purpose of glorifying God and when I have an attitude of ungratefulness and selfishness I am totally missing out on the blessings God has for me and more importantly I am missing out on allowing God to use me for Him. Who am I to think that I deserve more or different circumstances than what I have? All that I know is that I do not know much. LOL I am so glad God is in control and I am so glad that I have the Bible to show me that I will be truly unhappy as long as I try to live for myself. I need to have a servant's heart, to my God, my husband, and my children, everyone... Praying to get over myself and for God to keep working on my heart.
Thank you, Lord.
But that's not the right thinking. We all think that at times, right? You don't have to have a child with autism to get stressed out or feel like you deserve more or better. I guess I just keep thinking higher of myself than I should. Why do I feel like its unfair for me to have these trials or tribulations? Its because my focus is on things of this world. I'm comparing, I'm wanting to have it easy. I want life to be fun and carefree. But God doesn't promise me a life of ease....
"....In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." John 16:33
God will be right there with me through my trials. He has overcome the world, and that is such an awesome and powerful thing to think about. Through Jesus' blood I am forgiven and will live forever in Heaven with my Father and I need to focus on things of God, things of eternity and not things that change day by day. As I studied the Bible today I found myself in Romans...My favorite book....
"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2
What is God teaching me right now, through Jacob, through autism, through my hardships? What does God want me to learn? I need to keep praying that God will reveal His will for me through all this and know and trust that this is what's best for me and be content. Everything that I do I need to do for the purpose of glorifying God and when I have an attitude of ungratefulness and selfishness I am totally missing out on the blessings God has for me and more importantly I am missing out on allowing God to use me for Him. Who am I to think that I deserve more or different circumstances than what I have? All that I know is that I do not know much. LOL I am so glad God is in control and I am so glad that I have the Bible to show me that I will be truly unhappy as long as I try to live for myself. I need to have a servant's heart, to my God, my husband, and my children, everyone... Praying to get over myself and for God to keep working on my heart.
Thank you, Lord.
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