What it Means to Be a Father- Guest Post From Jordan

I've never called him "stepdad" in my heart. Somehow, he found this impossible balance of never overstepping, never trying to replace my dad, but still never letting me feel like anything other than his own. When people asked him how many kids he had, he never hesitated. "Three," he'd say, without skipping a beat. I wasn't his stepdaughter. I was just his daughter. Plain and simple. From tying my cleats at six years old to coaching my soccer team until I was sixteen, he was there: every game, every muddy tournament, every snack duty. And yes, we took home first place trophies at every tournament...except for one. He doesn't like to talk about it. 

Through all the chaos and deep uncertainty that came after my brother's autism diagnosis, when our family was thrown into a world of therapy sessions, meltdowns, and constant appointments, my dad never wavered. Not just in being a father to my brother, but in being present for all three of us. Somehow, he made each of us feel seen. he was the steady in the storm, the calm when things felt impossible. Watching him parent my brother has been like watching someone do something they were born for.

When I think about what it means to be a stepfather, I'm reminded of the most powerful example of a stepfather in all of history: Joseph, the earthly father of Jesus. Matthew 1:24 tells us, "Joseph did as the angel of Lord commanded him. He took Mary as his wife." He didn't just agree to raise a child that wasn't biologically his; he embraced it wholeheartedly. Just like my dad did with me. And when I look at the way my stepdad loves me, I can't help but see the reflection of God's love. I didn't earn it. I'm not his blood. But still, he chose me. He chooses me. Romans 5:8 says, "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." That's the kind of love my dad gives me...unearned, unwavering, and undeserved. This Father's Day, I'm thinking of all the men like him: stepdads, biological dads, adoptive dads, grandfathers, uncles, mentors, and every man who has ever stepped into a role they weren't born into but loved like they were. Happy Father's Day. You are seen, you are honored, and you are so deeply appreciated.  

Praying Like the Widow

 

The Parable of the Persistent Widow

Luke18 And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart. ² He said, “In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor respected man. ³ And there was a widow in that city who kept coming to him and saying, ‘Give me justice against my adversary.’ ⁴ For a while he refused, but afterward he said to himself, ‘Though I neither fear God nor respect man, ⁵ yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will give her justice, so that she will not beat me down by her continual coming.’” ⁶ And the Lord said, “Hear what the unrighteous judge says. ⁷ And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? ⁸ I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”

 

I’ve learned a lot from a recent lady’s Bible study. One thing that really stood out was about prayer, specifically persistent prayer. I realized I’ve kind of been avoiding it in certain areas of my life. Especially when it comes to praying for Jacob… for his healing and future. Autism in adulthood can be so different for everyone. I realized that lately I’ve been praying for the future I expect for him and I’ve just completely stopped praying for a future of independence for him or for healing or for more than what it appears like it will be.

 

I think it was a lack of faith. Also, I’ve been scared. Not scared of God but scared of being the “nagging wife.” You know that verse in Proverbs? ‘Better to live on the corner of a roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife’ , that one’s been playing on repeat in my head for years. I didn’t want to be that. I didn’t want to annoy God or seem like I couldn’t accept His will for Jacob. I don’t want to seem like I’m not content or don’t love Jacob as he is and it seems out of reach anyways. So, I just stopped bringing it up.

 

But when we studied the parable in Luke 18 (the one about the persistent widow) it hit me like a brick. Here’s this woman, going back again and again to a judge who doesn’t even care about her and yet, she doesn’t stop. She keeps showing up, asking for justice. And eventually, the judge gives in — not because he’s kind, but because she won’t give up. And then Jesus says something powerful: ‘…will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night?”

 

And something shifted for me. When we looked at this story not just from a Western perspective, but through an Eastern lens, I saw God’s character in an even deeper way. In that culture, widows had no power, no voice—and yet Jesus chose her as the example. The judge is corrupt and cold… but God is the opposite. He is just. He listens. He lifts up the powerless.

It helped me see that God doesn’t just tolerate my prayers—He welcomes them. He’s not rolling His eyes or waiting for me to stop. He’s a God who hears the cry of the vulnerable, the overlooked, the tired moms praying in whispers or tears. He’s not distant. He’s near. And that gives me courage to keep praying—not just because I want answers, but because I now see more clearly the kind of God I’m praying to.

 

It clicked: God is not annoyed by our persistence. He welcomes it. The widow wasn’t called naggy. She wasn’t scolded. She was commended. Jesus used her as a model for how we should pray-with boldness, with trust, and yes, with repetition.

 

And I realized that society (and maybe my unbiblical view of how women should be) has made me think I need to just be quiet. To accept whatever comes and not go to God for the desires of my heart. 

 

He tells me to come to Him. And if what I’m asking is righteous: healing, hope, restoration then He’s not bothered. He’s moved. 

 

Now, He may not give me exactly what I ask, His justice may look different, but that doesn’t mean I should stop asking. Because prayer is about bringing my heart into His presence over and over, again and again.

 

So I’ve started to once again pray for Jacob — not just once and walk away, but persistently, faithfully, and with the confidence that God is listening. And Jacob is praying, too!

“God, I’ve held back my prayers because I’ve been scared—scared of being disappointed, of asking too much, of being “too much.” But You aren’t annoyed by me. You welcome me. Thank You for being a God who sees and hears. Help me to pray with boldness, not because I have it all figured out, but because I trust that You are good, and You are near. Teach me to come back again and again, not to wear You down—but to be near You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

If you’ve stopped praying, maybe today is the day to start again. Come like the widow—bold, persistent, and believing that God hears you. He’s not tired of your voice. Keep showing up.